Required · T.C.A. § 36-6-405 · Supreme Court Rule 31

Rule 31 family mediation

In a custody dispute the parties are required to attend mediation before a contested hearing. The requirement is subject to exceptions, including where there has been domestic violence, and a court may excuse or modify it.

A mediator does not decide anything. Marti will not rule, will not recommend an outcome to the judge, and will not tell either parent what a court would do. Her role is to help the two of you reach an agreement you can both sign, and to report only whether that happened.

Required
T.C.A. § 36-6-408

Parent education seminar

Both parents, as soon as possible after filing.

Four hours in aggregate. Children do not attend.

Required
T.C.A. § 36-6-405

Rule 31 family mediation

Before a contested hearing in a custody dispute.

Exceptions apply, including domestic violence.

You are here

Required
T.C.A. § 36-6-404

Permanent parenting plan entered

The court enters the plan that governs from here.

Only a judge can change it once entered.

When ordered
By order or agreement

Parenting coordination

Discretionary, and only after a plan exists.

Fixed term, authority limited to the order.

When it is required, when it is excepted

Required

Custody or residential schedule is disputed and a contested hearing is sought. Mediation comes first.

May be excepted

Where there has been domestic violence between the parties, and in other circumstances the statute and the court recognise. If a protective order exists, or you are afraid of the other parent, say so before a session is scheduled. That is not a complication; it is information the process is built to receive.

Held apart

Where mediation proceeds but the parties should not be in a room together, the session is conducted shuttle style, with each parent in a separate room or a separate video room, and the mediator moving between them. Arrival and departure times are staggered.

A session, in order

0:00–0:15

Opening. What mediation is, what it is not, what she may and may not report, and confirmation that both parties are attending voluntarily in the sense that no agreement can be forced on them.

0:15–0:45

Each parent states what they want and why, without interruption. Attorneys may be present.

0:45–2:30

Issue by issue: the residential schedule, holidays, exchanges, decision-making, communication. Private caucus with each parent as needed.

2:30–3:00

Terms agreed are written down and read back. What remains unagreed is listed as unagreed, with no characterisation of who refused.

After

A Rule 31 report is filed stating that mediation occurred and whether the matter resolved in whole, in part, or not at all. Nothing said in the session goes into it.

Confidentiality: mediation and coordination are not the same

In mediation, what is said is confidential. Statements made in the session are not reported to the judge and are not admissible against you. The mediator's report says that mediation happened and whether agreement was reached. It does not say what you offered, what you refused or how you behaved.

In parenting coordination, the opposite is true. A coordinator reports to the court, and what you say to her can appear in that report.

Two limits apply in both roles. A mediator or coordinator must act where a child is at risk of harm, and where the law requires a report to be made. Confidentiality never covers a threat of harm.

Fees and who pays

Hourly, billed to both parties

Mediation is charged at an hourly rate including preparation and the drafting of any agreement reached. Unless the court orders otherwise, the fee is divided equally between the parties and each pays their own half directly.

PEMF eligibility

Where a party is indigent and the case qualifies under Supreme Court Rule 38, mediation is compensated from the Divorcing Parent Education and Mediation Fund and that party pays nothing. Eligibility is determined by the court, not by this office.

Deposit and cancellation

A deposit is taken from each party at scheduling and credited against the session. Full terms are on the fee and payment page.

What to bring

A calendar covering the next twelve months, including your work schedule and the children's school and activity dates. Any existing order or plan. A written list of what you want, in order of importance to you.

Do not bring the children. Do not bring recordings, message screenshots or a file of grievances; mediation is not a hearing and there is nothing to prove.

If the other parent will not participate

Attend anyway. If the other parent does not appear or leaves, the report states that mediation was attempted and did not proceed. It does not assign blame, and the court draws its own conclusion.

Your own attendance is what you control, and it is the part that protects you. Failing to attend a required mediation is a matter the court can address against the party who failed.

Rule 31 training held

A Rule 31 family mediator completes 46 hours of training approved by the Alternative Dispute Resolution Commission, including four hours of domestic violence screening and six hours of Tennessee family law, and six hours of continuing education every two years.

Hours completed, dates, and current listing status are set out on the For Attorneys page.